Why I would vote for 'The Captain'

Disclaimer: This is a very long blog post and contains political views which might influence your political views.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Last time I posted, I seem to have mentioned the then upcoming Internal Tests. Kids around here were studying pretty hard for them, because the tests would determine what batch they would land up in, for the revision classes: The Alpha Batch, Beta Batch and the Gamma Batch. Our results were horrible, to say the least-- The top mark from our class wouldn't have crossed 45%. The top 3 in the tests were from the F2 section. Apparently, the overall topper had scored 45/180 in the first paper and 170/180 in the second. A real shocker.

Well, to some students' relief, the teachers had decided that due to our poor performance, there would be no segregation at all. All that preparation hadn't gone to waste, though; we had our first AIiTS soon after.

Also, in the past week, we created some sort of record in class. We managed to annoy 3 teachers (Yes, 3 teachers- Eng, CSc and Pandit) successively without getting Chandrasekhar sir angry. Annoying our English teacher wasn't too difficult-- we all collectively started moaning 'K-R' at the beginning of class; and voila!

Just after Pandit's class, we were copying a ray diagram from the board when our CS sir walked in. He wasn't very amused, and although the next day was the computer exam, he gave his period to Pandit. Pandit apparently 'promised' to let us home by 3, and a small misunderstanding led to him becoming angry. He made us study for the exam in that period.

That done, let me shift to the main topic... Politics. Yes, politics. I spend more than 20 minutes every day reading the newspaper (no sports) and after the number of biased political articles I've read, I felt the need to write one and spread awareness of politics--at the state level, to begin with--to my peers.

I find it a bit saddening that most students today don't like the state India is in, and don't want to change it either. Every other student I meet says "I don't care about politics; I'm not going to vote". 

In Tamil Nadu, there are 3 major leaders we get to choose between during elections. Voting for anyone else is equivalent to a NULL vote, at least in the bigger picture. The three biggies are:

1. A grand old guy (not Shubham) who writes Tamil poems,
2. A lady who thinks she's got everything under control,and
3. Captain.

Namma Captain

I shall be explaining, one by one, why you should elect Captain to power in the next state elections. I'm not talking about Dhoni, but a captain with far, far greater powers. Most of you might laugh at what I'm saying right now; but trust me, by the end of this article, you'll... probably still laugh. *sigh*

Anyway, here goes.

1. Courage: You'd expect a good leader to be a person of bravery and strength. Captain casually strolled into the political arena at a time when there were only two players. Takes guts, fellas. The fact that Captain managed to gather 3 million people at the time only indicates the fearlessness and popularity that Captain enjoys.
2. Powers: As you might have observed, Captain boasts of an arsenal of powers. I'm not talking about the powers that come with leadership, nor eye power. Captain can do anything he wants; including flying across buildings, making others think of him as a 20-year old, and doing his detective work on Windows Media Player. There, I gave you some proof too.
3. Kindness: Once, there was this car driver who had this story to tell me:
   "A week ago, I visited Captain's party office, at lunch time, and the moment I went in, they asked: Did you eat, sir? Obviously, I said No, of course not. Then, immediately, they gave me a plate of chicken biriyani. My vote goes to Captain!!"
   I don't know why the driver went to the office, but what would you prefer, 1Kg rice for 10 Rupees or a plate of Chicken Biriyani for free? 
4. Mass Leader: Although he does possess a lot of mass, he's also a leader of the masses. See, he turns up for most of his speeches drunk (doesn't make a big difference, anyway) and yet, manages to deliver. Manages to convince people. Manages to talk like a leader. Clearly, there is something that differentiates him from the rest. He's not human.

I hope that we all agree now on who our best leader is.
See you all next time.
Auro